Stories That Make Me Laugh: "Car Accident" Edition

An old friend of mine sent me a message on Facebook the other day in which she reminded me of this guy that we went to highschool with. I laughed after reading her message, and then immediately thought of this story. But first let me give you a little background info on this guy that we went to highschool with. He was quite the character, and one of those kids that everyone knew. He wasn't exactly well known though because he was super nice or really talented at something... no he was well known because he had a "unique" sense of style. I say "unique" because his style revolved around one specific article of clothing, his shoes. He LOVED these shoes, the rest of our school HATED these shoes. They were a pair of old Birkenstock clogs, which really doesn't seem all that bad, except for the fact that they had holes in the top and his toes would stick out. But everyday it was always all about these shoes with him (it was actually a tad ridiculous his love affair with these shoes). I remember he had a hard time choosing his senior picture because of his shoes. He really liked the far away full body shot, but he was bummed because the true "essence" of the shoes had not been captured (and by that I mean that you could vaguely see the shoes in the picture, but since it was so far away you couldn't see his toes... and yes I am totally serious). He also used to want to be Dawson from Dawson's Creek. This isn't soooooo bad due to the fact that this was back in the day when Dawson's Creek had just begun, and was all the rage, and well who didn't want to be Dawson (or Pacey, Joey, or Jen). However, he would actually pretend he was Dawson. He had a name for his version of the show, and he would give us weekly updates on how it would play out. Odd, but true... and for some reason we all went along with this (and his many other idiosyncrasies). So needless to say this kid was quite the interesting one! However, he also wasn't the brightest bulb in the chandelier, which brings me to my story. Our junior year we had a first period class together. It was geometry, and he would always sit diagonally one seat behind me (that way he could attempt to cheat off of me). This didn't exactly bother me due to the fact that I was on to his scheme... oh, that and the fact that he would blatantly ask me if he could cheat off of my tests (he wasn't exactly Mr. Sly). So anyways, one day I am sitting at my desk and he comes tearing into our classroom, a little on the late side, and we have the following interaction.

He makes a bit of a scene and looks at me: "Vic, Vic, are you alright?" 

Surprised, and quite confused, I sort of just blankly stare at him and respond: "Ummm, yeah. Why?" 

He then says: "Weren't you just in a car accident?"

Me: "Ummm. No."

Him: "Are you sure?"

Me, still totally confused: "Yeah, I'm sure."

Him: "But I just drove through five corners (this insanely awful intersection near our school) and I saw your car... smashed and on fire!".

Me: "Oh, but it wasn't me. I've been here this whole time."

Him: "But it was YOUR car. Are YOU sure you're OK."

Me (and by now I am really wanting to start laughing like crazy, but I am nice, and so I am holding it in so as not to make him feel even more ridiculous then he is already being): "I am positive. I am OK, and it really wasn't MY car, but thanks for the concern."

Him: "But it looked like YOUR car. Are YOU SURE it WASN'T?"

Me: "Yup, I'm sure." And then I thought this to myself: "Ummm, yeah. OK I get it buddy. It LOOKED like my car, but it WASN'T MY CAR!" Apparently though this was a bit of a lost cause, as he just really wasn't getting it, and so we continued to go on for just a little bit longer with more of the same back and forth as above. 

So I really was not in a car accident that day. The car he saw may have looked like mine, but it wasn't, and for some reason he just could not wrap his head around this fact. So during the rest of class he just sort of looked at me like I had just survived some horrific event, and it was a miracle that I was sitting here at my desk... unharmed.